As time goes closer
my excitement grows more.

I am looking forward to going to the airport
to pick up my fiancee

to hug him
and hold him
and kiss him so warmly

unfortunately
My anxiety makes me, at times, unbearable.
i complain
i moan.
and i go on and on.

I am trying to change
i am trying to be positive
and i am trying to not complain at all

its hard.
sometimes.
it happens when i don't know it.

I don't want to be like that when he and i get married
i want to talk with out complaining
and i feel when he and i were in person
i did a good job in that.

all i want right now
is to talk to him about anything
and everything,

I don't want to push him away with my stupid anxiety

I know he loves me no matter what.

And i hope I change soon.
to make the relationship better.

I love you scottie honey
and i look forward to marrying you